Avengers: The most ambitious crossover event in history!
The Draw Play:

UNIVERSES HAVE COLLIDED FOLKS. THE DRAW PLAY LORE DEEPENS. What if Ben, Rivers, and Eli haven’t been in this series of gags because…they are on earth doing Ringless Rivers? IT’S ALL CONNECTED. Pretend I inserted that picture of Charlie from Always Sunny looking insane with all the connections on the wall.

So yesterday I was talking to a couple of work friends who know jack shit about sports and do not read my comic because they are mean people who don’t support artists and one of them asked me how my comic week was going (I mentioned earlier in the week that this particular week was going to be stressful due to the extra comic work I’m doing). I told her it was going well. They asked for a link. I was reluctant to send it, because I knew they wouldn’t get it, and in that moment it really hit me just how absurd this entire thing keeps getting.

This is a week for the long-time readers who have been here since Comic #69 (nice). If a new reader stumbled on the site right now, it would make absolutely zero sense. This is deep lore stuff. My longest running gag, quite possibly the worst thing to start with. In that vein, since there is a chance my co-workers open the site back up tomorrow (they wont), maybe I should post a recap down here of the events thus far, so that newbies can get caught up. Don’t worry, it’ll make a lot of sense soon.

-Joe Flacco (Orange #5 in this comic, but originally of the Ravens) was a mediocre QB who won a super bowl and then signed the then-biggest contract in NFL history. Joe made a money fort in his bedroom, because Joe Flacco is a goober who wouldn’t be flashy and spend it.

-Not too long afterward, Aaron Rodgers (Packers QB) also signed a huge contract. He made a money castle. Andy Dalton then got paid, and then Joe and Andy teamed up with Aaron to make a super-money fort.

-Soon afterward, JJ Watt, the defensive superstar who hates quarterbacks, also go paid and smashed the money fort. Joe and the QBs fled and decided to create a money island to escape and met up with Cam Newton and Ryan Tannehill. They were rejected by Jay Cutler and Tony Romo. Tiny boy Russell Wilson then joined them. Things began to look kind of bleak, especially once Olivier Vernon joined forces with Watt, and they began to crush money island. Andrew Luck stopped them in a money zeppelin, only to get annihilated by Von Miller’s money satellite, which was then subsequently blown up by Derek Carr’s money nuke.

-Somewhere in the ocean, Revis makes an island and everyone forgets about him.

-Joe Flacco, our hero, convinced all these players to stop fighting and join up once more in order to challenge the fabric of money space time, the money gods (players from other leagues who get paid far better than NFL players do). This became the grand struggle. They joined up with Matt Stafford at his lost city of money. They realized they needed more space, and decided to colonize the moon. They contacted Jimmy Garoppolo for his money rocket ship.

-During this time frame, Alex Smith, QB of the Chiefs, was leading a mission to Mars. He spent several attempts checking down to the moon instead, because he is too cautious. He eventually made it to Mars, but was subsequently traded away and had not been seen until now, as a member of the Redskins. Note: he has also been recently paid some big bucks.

-The money crew encountered difficulties with life support, finding stowaway Blake Bortles. He begins an antagonistic relationship with Russell Wilson. The crew is then aided by Kirk Cousins and Matt Ryan, as well as Khalil Mack, OBJ, and Aaron Donald. They reach the moon, only to find out Aaron Rodgers has already started a colony there. They decide to make it bigger.

-The order of the money meets to discuss their new base. Carson Wentz and Russell Wilson, who was paid again, have contributed more. Nick Foles, who is known for having a large penis, has built a giant gun penis. In this era however, Joe Flacco, Ryan Tannehill, and Blake Bortles have all been abandoned by their original teams and sent elseware. Russell Wilson has decided he is done taking orders from these washed up losers and shoots them out of the penis gun.

There! Now we are caught up. Should be easy to understand now.