Man this is the one exact matchup I wanted the least out of every possible option. But putting aside my personal rooting preferences…this was a pretty good week of football chaos! The Ravens offense put on a wild show of failure on the biggest stage yet. The Chiefs defense and Spags just completely shut the Ravens down. They barely ran the ball and they couldn’t get anything going in the passing game. Felt like they were outclassed on all levels. But the Chiefs still can’t score and the Ravens defense came to play so the game was never out of hand. The Ravens would bungle 2 golden opportunities to tie the game up and score, first on Zay Flowers nightmare fumble and then with Lamar’s nightmare INT. If both of those drives that reached deep Chiefs territory turn into points, we could have had a close game, a tie game, or even a Ravens lead! Ooof, man.

And yet, maybe pick your poison. Would you rather lay a fat egg all game after so much anticipation or take the lead and be in control before choking it away? The Ravens did the former and the Lions did the latter. It genuinely felt, for at least 2 quarters, like we were about to live in a world where the Detroit Lions were in the Super Bowl. Then it just…slipped away. The amazing team we saw dominate the first half couldn’t execute. The 49ers finally started to do exactly that. The moment was too big for Detroit. Teams with bright futures always like to say “we’ll be back”. The harsh reality is they very well may not be. This may be the farthest Detroit gets for another 30 years. We don’t know. We should praise them for what they accomplished this year and be hopeful for them, but this game is going to sting for a long time if they never break through.

Live by Dan Campbell, die by Dan Campbell. I still love his audacity and a lot of the failures they had in the second half were more of an execution problem than a philosophy problem. A guy couldn’t hold on, etc. But that said, sometimes it’s not bad to take the points. He did it before halftime but then later with the Lions trailing by a field goal and well within range with time winding down, they instead went for it, failed, and the 49ers marched down the field to score a TD, putting themselves up by 10 and effectively ending the game. It’s okay to take the points, Dan. Being tied at 27 with some time left is not a bad place to be. Would this move have been praised if it worked and they scored? Yeah probably. That’s the tradeoff. But it felt like a questionable choice at the time and it bit them hard when it flopped. Love him or hate him, Dan Campbell brings the Chaos, and I love him for that.


Lots of great moments! Lamar’s TD throw was wild and exactly the kind of play that makes him special.
-Lamar caught his own batted pass! Then ran for a first down! How do you not love this guy?
-Lamar also threw a terrible pick into triple coverage late in the game and probably sealed it with the pick. If Lamar puts the ball near the back of the endzone there is a small chance it works out, but the ball never should have been thrown. Terrible time to have your worst game of the year.
Brandon Aiyuk’s miracle catch to start the 49ers rally is amazing. It looks to be picked or deflected and then he catches it in midair after the bounce. Spectacular.
Zay Flowers with maybe the worst single drive of the weekend. Catches an incredible deep ball and then immediately taunts the defender. Fumbles the ball trying to reach the endzone. Slices his hand open on the sideline while venting his frustration. Took the Ravens’ best chance of getting back into the game and singlehandedly ruined it. This game will haunt him for a long time.

-It’s funny, but there are things to very much not trust about both squads. The 49ers spent both the Packers and Lions game looking like butt for a good chunk of the runtime, existing by virtue of the other team making just enough mistakes to keep them in it. It is hard to win consistently like that. The Chiefs keep defying expectations but they still can’t put up many points. They did nothing on offense but punt the entire second half. This almost feels like we are heading for a game where the Chiefs go up early and the 49ers come back to win it, like a reverse 2019 SB.

The Ravens were the best team in football until all of a sudden they were huge, hairy ass.

Lions man, you had it! You had it in your arms and you let it slip through. Heartbreaking.


The Ravens offense was so thoroughly outcoached and outplayed. The one touchdown they had was a broken play where Lamar did cool Lamar stuff. They looked awful the whole rest of the game.



Here we are. One final game.

So now we have the one matchup I didn’t want out of all possible matchups. I don’t even know if I am rooting for either team in this game but more against both teams in some way, thinking about who would be happy at the end and who I would find more annoying. Do I really want the Chiefs fans, already well above the threshold of whiney and insufferable, to get even more privileged? Does Mahomes really need another ring? Do I want Toney to get another ring on a team he actively spent the season sabotaging? Do I really want to see even more Kelce and Mahomes in every commercial? Do I really want to listen to them croon around how “everyone counted us out” as the most successful franchise of the last 5 years wins again? Fuck.
On the other side, do I really want to listen to the Purdy Posse get even more irritating? Do I really want a blessed franchise with 5 championships to get even richer? Do I have any tolerance for that tech-bro fanbase at all? Don’t I get more enjoyment out of watching Kyle Shanahan choke? I still like Mahomes more than I ever liked Brady and him winning doesn’t fill me with as much dread.
The Taylor Swift thing is part of it too! Do I find all the media attention kind of dumb? Yeah! But it’s gotten so much milder. Do I find the people who still whine about it most loudly to be absolute tools? Even moreso! The Chiefs winning the game would make a very irritating type of person very mad, and that thought brings me joy. But that’s not me rooting for the Chiefs, that’s me rooting for people I don’t like to be annoyed, and having my enjoyment of a game hinge on annoying people I don’t like being unhappy because of something barely related to the game at all is silly.
I guess looking at it, I’m kinda leaning that I prefer the 49ers to win. I know a lot of 49er friends who I would be very happy for. I would also be very happy for George Kittle and Aiyuk and Deebo. At least the 49ers haven’t won a Super Bowl since the mid-90’s. I’d rather see a reverse version of the outcome if I have to watch this Super Bowl matchup again. Annoyed by discourse or not, Mr Irrelevant leading the team to a Super Bowl victory would honestly be pretty cool.
If I have to pick who I think will win, I’m done picking against the Chiefs. They’ve gone on the road and shocked two teams that were supposed to be better than them. The 49ers had to barely hang on to eek out a win against two teams they were supposed to be better than. The Chiefs have the fire in them. When an outstanding offense meets outstanding defense, defense seems like it comes out on top in these playoff scenarios. So I think Chiefs win it.
I hope the game doesn’t suck. Maybe that’s all I really want. Please give us a good game.

I don’t know what my drawing bets will be yet. Feel free to suggest some.