A fitting comic for the end of a boring and stupid offseason. It ends tonight, friends, get crunk. Our long and boring 2017 offseason journey ends with the football equivalent of coke zero. Tonight the Arizona Third Stringers play the Dallas Probable Cuts in the annual Hall of Fame game.

Why is the Hall of Fame game on a Thursday night now? Did the NFL look at the HoF game and ask themselves…How can we make it somehow even worse? You know that Thursday Night Football thing we have that everyone agrees is pretty bad even when the season is in full swing? Why not take the lamest, least consequential football game of the entire year and do that with it? Yeah, that’s a good idea. I’d wager a bunch of people don’t even realize it’s on tonight and still assume it’s on this Sunday as a cap to HoF weekend, like it always is. But it’s not.

I wonder if the field will work this time. Last year had literally the best Hall of Fame game ever, because it didn’t actually get played due to a three stooges level comedy of errors. (This is one of my personal favorite comics that I will look back on fondly in my dying years)

Maybe they are worried that there might be injuries in this game, and the extra few days will let these 4th stringers with no hope and no prayers recover a little better so they can be fresh for the first round of cuts later in the preseason. The Arizona starters are literally not playing a down tonight. We get literal Blaine Gabbert as the starting QB for the Cardinals. Blaine Gabbert. Blaine Gabbert.  Some people will argue “Who cares, it’s football”, but you have to have standards. Have some dignity. Don’t be me in the comic up there. Have some shame.

I’ll probably watch it because what the hell else is on Thursday night?