The Game For True Sickos
The year is 2025. I am nearing ever closer to my 40s. I have limited things I can do in a day, but a seemingly unlimited amount of things to do. The simple pleasures and time spent not suffering grow thinner and thinner. Maybe it is this passing of time and the realization of how valuable those moments are that have led me down this path of being repulsed by the sickos amongst you who gleefully turn into the Hall of Fame Game and put fucking Trey Lance propaganda on my timeline in the year 2025.
There is joy to be found in the Hall of Fame game experience. Maybe your team is playing and it is your first look at the reserves. You just feel the thrill of seeing your team on screen. Maybe you are a degenerate gambler who is so far gone that betting on a 4th stringer who will be cut in a week to score a 2nd half TD becomes the only way you can feel anything. Maybe you are related to someone in the game. Maybe you just need pleasant background noise while you do chores. Maybe you are just a sick freak who needs football so badly that you turn on the most meaningless football experience in the entire calendar year and actually have opinions on it.
As my bones crumble and my brain fogs in my old age, I can’t help but start looking at these things as infinitely ignorable so I can focus on things that make me feel more enriched. I could have watched the Hall of Fame game. I was at my desk. I was just drawing. I could have put it on. It would have sufficed. But I didn’t. I put on a show that I’d been meaning to watch for a while, watched a bunch of episodes, and came away happy. I finished my drawing before the game was over. I left my desk and went to play Death Stranding 2, a game that is not as good as the first but still gives me a sort of experience I simply can’t get from anything else. I have no regrets.
To those sickos amongst you who tune in every year because “I’ll take any football over no football” or however you want to put it: why? If the Hall of Fame Game was completely eliminated from existence next year, what would you really lose? I wouldn’t lose a damn thing, and neither would most people, even the most devoted football fans. The most memorable hall of fame game of the past decade didn’t happen. I would lose something without regular football. I would lose something without the draft. I would even lose something if preseason got further axed. Does watching a meaningless exhibition game really mean so much that you couldn’t fill those 3 hours with something else that gave you a more meaningful time on this earth, even if just barely? You don’t have to settle for any football just because it’s any football. You can just…not.
At the very least, if it does bring you that much joy, at least keep your damn Trey Lance propaganda off my timeline what the fuck is wrong with you it’s the goddamn Hall of Fame Game you don’t have to have a take on everything go outside jesus christ
To be honest I kind if forgot Trey Lance even existed that man is a phantom
Ehhhh, once you actually hit 40, you kind of stop wasting your own time wondering why other people enjoy what they enjoy. How long did it take you to think of what to write above, and then actually put it down into words? Could you not have spent that time doing something else, and just posted the comic with a simple, “I don’t like the Hall of Fame game” beneath? XD
The ability to judge others for what they’re into is an endless fathomless darkness, there is no line, no border at which it stops, and while you wonder how someone can stand an exhibition game, someone else is a few feet behind you wondering how you can enjoy non-postseason football, and behind them is someone wondering how they can enjoy football at all, and behind them…
Also, I’m judging you for playing Death Stranding 2 on a Playstation console. The only TRUE way to enjoy Death Stranding is to wait for it to hit PC, and pray to God the spoilering jerks out there don’t get there claws into you first. I’ve been hearing it’s not as good as the first from a number of people, which sucks.
Also also, shame on you for making this a comic about Buzzsaw or Jigsaw or whatever that idiot’s name is. You could have made this a Death Stranding comic, and the incinerator is… a football stadium, and the sickos are carrying a corpse dressed up in an exhibition uni… and they’re going, uh, they’re going there to incinerate it before it goes necro, which is like the regular season… so that we don’t suffer a voidout, which is when the players go on strike. SEE?!?! IT’S COMEDY GOLD!!!!! X’D