Most of us have played football in some form in our lives, if it’s backyard 2 hand touch to College level ball it doesn’t matter. It’s a great game. A few of my friends played at reasonable levels, too. Most of them don’t brag about it.

The Vet is different. The Vet wants you to know that they played ball, and that somehow qualifies them to know everything. Usually it’s not higher than High School varsity, or maybe for division 3 college, and it was years ago, but clearly it was enough experience to understand the entire spectrum of football. They think players are wimps because they got hit once and it didn’t hurt that bad. They know what the players should do, they know why the coach is a failure and what he should call. They know everything, even though they are at least a decade removed from ball and never played at a high level. The funniest part to me is the Vet is usually a massive proponent of the “NFL IS A BUNCH OF PUSSIES, YOU CANT HIT PEOPLE ANYMORE” school of thought yet they almost always have a lingering injury due to the sport.

At least according to them. I think many of them stopped playing because they sucked.