Antonio Clown’s Very Real Vaccine Card
If you’d have asked me at the beginning of the season which notable player would get busted using a fake vaccine card, Brown might have been my first choice. Glad to know some people just fit right into the stereotype of who they are.
I’m not surprised there were fake vax cards being sold to players on the Bucs. I wouldn’t be shocked if there are some fake vax cards on every team. The real question now is what happens to Brown. Bruce Arians was one of the most vocal proponents of the vaccine. With his health problems, he very much values safety. The Bucs were one of, if not the first, “fully” vaccinated team. He’s also on record saying that if Brown does anything stupid, he’s gone.
He said that before Brown helped the Bucs win a super bowl. Brown has mostly been quiet with the nonsense until this occurred. Kick him off the team, Bruce. Stick by your guns. Send the clown into the sewers once more.
It won’t happen but I agree. Realistically Brown will serve his suspension and then after another Super Bowl will be resigned as long as Tom says he wants it to happen
Not sure how happy Brady is with him right now tbh fam. Allegedly Brown used Alex Guerrero as his patsy to get the fake vax card to the Bucs. His guy already gets shade as a quack, the last thing he needed was for his name to be brought up in a vaccination controversy
You know for sure it was Guerrero? I’d scrutinize Bradys and Gronks cards too if that was the case. That dude *IS* a quack, Bradys own Dr. Nick Riviera.
Call 1-800-DOCTORB !
The ‘B’ is for ‘Bargain’ !!!
The more you look at his “Vacks” card, the better it gets.
Ohh man, best part for me is the Cool S, but it’s backwards.
I’d love to see them cut him, but never gonna happen. He helps prop up Old Man Brady. And you just can’t make Li’l Tommy upset. He single-handedly wins games 1000% all by himself every single week – even when he throws Pick 6s – so he needs his AB Binky. Because his name is… *shakes knees together violently and thrusts fist into the heavens while having a seizure* Thomas Edward Patrick BUHHH–RAAAADDDY!
Kind of a weird take, when the Patriots were constantly getting rid of guys Brady liked, and he rarely said a word about it publicly. Yet Peyton would tell every publication in existence about how they HAD to sign Marvin Harrison, and Reggie Wayne, and Edgerrin, and Dallas Clark and on and on and on until he had no defense and they lost most of their important games… and I just realized I’m kinda okay how that worked out.
*cries in Brandin Cooks trade*
But yeah, Gronk was really the only superstar that Belichick didn’t axe after a few productive seasons and even then he literally dealt him to Detroit in 2018. Luckily Gronk threatened retirement to stay a Patriot, but man, I really wish we got to see more of some of those connections Brady had. It was a big reason why he never put up the insane volume stats that Manning did. A revolving door at WR and a QB that just never said a damn thing about it until he got really old and decided to retire in Florida.
I won’t pretend I executed it flawlessly, but my intent was less about poking fun at Brady himself, and more against the Cult of Brady who constantly proclaim he’s the only guy on the field winning all these championships by his lonesome. Guys like… *cough*S#&$tBrainless*cough*.
I agree that BB refused to kowtow to him… and look what happened. He took his toys and left town.
BB refused to treat him like a star after two decades and six rings so he went to Tampa and won another one without BB, who still has a losing record without Brady
This right here is what I’m talkin’ ’bout. A team sport, with dozens of different skill players, coaches, owners, situations, and nuance that distinguish one game from another, let alone seasons.
But let’s boil it down to “BB has a losing record without Brady.” As if Tom Brady is literally the ONLY reason BB has had success. If only life were this simple, I might not suck at it so badly.
What happens if BB finds success with Mac Jones? Do we change it to: “Well, BB only has a winning record with Brady or Mac”?
I’m a Dolphins fan. I literally don’t care about Brady at all. I think Bellichick is overrated and not the goat coach and as long as it continues being true I’ll continue hammering the point about him having a losing record without Brady. It’d take him about three seasons if (big if) he can keep up this season’s winning percentage consistently. It’ll probably take him a few more years, and I expect he’ll eventually get a ring without Brady. When the divorce happened, I said in this comment section that I expected them to have some success apart from each other but never reaching the heights they did so together and I’m sticking by that prediction. That doesn’t stop me from being petty enough to hate on BB every opportunity I get
Oh no I totally understood your point. sTim’s reply just reminded me of some very unfortunate moves that I am totally *NOT* still mad about. I respect Bill for sticking to his guns for the most part and not selling out to surround Brady with weapons galore, instead allocating those funds to building great teams overall. Also, seeing Skip have a complete meltdown over New England winning a game in which their QB threw 3 total passes was and still is absolutely hilarious.
The way the site stacks comments makes it look at a glance like I’m replying to you, but I was trying to explain my “weird take” to sTim. I agree with everything you said. Except I think my favorite Skip moment is when he says, with a completely straight face, “I am, if nothing else, an OBJECTIVE. Cowboys. Fan.”
LOLOLOL, aw man, that one gets me every time. I watch Undisputed religiously just to see Shannon blast ol’ Skipperino.
Oof. Now that I look at it, yeah you were replying to sTim. Well no harm no foul right?
Skiiiiiiiuuup really is a funny dude. I follow the guy on Twitter just because half of what he tweets feel like straight up satire. He’s a paid troll and having a guy like Shannon Sharpe play off of him is perfect.
I bet he won’t stick to his guns. They will pull the “but he is a good boy” bullshit and act like them being there for him is what is best….
I think if this happened earlier in the season, AB would have most certainly been cut. Right now, though? I can’t see it happening. It’s too close to the playoffs and for as stupid as AB is, he is immensely talented and it is guaranteed that another contender will scoop him up immediately. Considering how banged up Tampa’s secondary has been all season, I doubt they want to take a chance on allowing a superstar wideout to potentially join Green Bay or Los Angeles right before the playoffs start. Plus, he still makes that offense significantly better, even if they’re still really good without him.
My guess is that they’ll keep him through the playoffs and let him go after their season ends. Obviously Brady won’t be pleased with that, but it’s not like he’s hurting for weapons down there. AB’s been out the last 6 or so games and Brady’s still leading the MVP race by a pretty comfy margin, so it’s not like they’re dying here lol. I’d say this just increases the probability of Chris Godwin coming back on a new deal next year.
another gold star for fizur and maderno!!!
In a just world the decision wouldn’t be up to Bruce Arians. Forging or commissioning a forgery of a vaccine card is a federal offense. Every player that submitted a fake card should be going to jail; should.
Should, but he’s an NFL player. The worst him or other players will get is probation and a paltry fine.
Every time I see Arians show up in this comic my first reaction is “wait, what the hell is wrong with the art / his face?”
Then I remember he’s a goddamn thumb and I laugh all over again. Excelsior good sir.
by “excelsior!” i believe you mean “thumbs up!”
Also good.
(i see what you did there)
AB is in Florida, it would be bath salts not liquid meth
Mr. Breached Containment
Can someone please explain this B.C. meme?
Antonio Brown at one point insisted people refer to him as “Mr. Big Chest.”
That’s about it.
Not believable. Not enough writing mistakes on the vacks-card.
Hey Dave, here’s your pool update post week 13:
You got a 9, along with half of the pool participants, just one point shy of the weekly win. There were four 10’s. This also means not all of Week 13’s prize money got claimed, and Week 14 is worth extra! Also, the leader of the pool only put up a 7 and found himself in a tie for first with two others.
Overall you’re at 115*, which is good for 11th – 12th place. The three current leaders now have 124.