Wont Anyone Think of the Glazers
Brandon Perna of That’s Good Sports released a video a week ago on the decline of Tony Romo as a sportscaster. In it, he made a pretty good point that I hadn’t yet considered in why Tony Romo sucks now. One of the primary reasons a lot of us have gotten sick of Romo in recent times is his incessant glazing of Mahomes. But during pretty much Tony’s entire career as a sportscaster, Mahomes has been the primary face of the league and the Chiefs the premier team. Since Romo works the A team with Jim Nantz, and until a couple seasons ago CBS always covered AFC matchups, Romo would just end up calling Chiefs games all the time. As our fatigue of the Chiefs grew, listening to Romo jizz all over him at every available opportunity just ballooned our resentment of him. This isn’t to say Romo is just a victim of timing and scheduling. Romo’s love for Mahomes is extremely tiring, and here is where I bolster my argument by posting the clip of Romo trying to argue Pat dirt balling a wide open Kelce is a winning play. There is simply no excuse for that call.
By extension, the same problem has infected Collinsworth. Since he covers the premier primetime game every week, he was naturally going to call a lot of Chiefs games in the last decade. He’s not quite as deep in the Mahomes froth as Romo but he’s still noticeable about it. Watching a Chiefs game with either one of these guys was an insufferable experience that only got worse as the Chiefs offense degraded and Mahomes’ play became more indistinguishable from other QBs. It was easy to understand the glaze when Mahomes was doing wild shit every other play. It was tedious when Mahomes adapted to more modern defenses and started just playing effective quick-throw football and the Chiefs offense stalled out every other drive. It was insufferable last year when the Chiefs got blessed by bullshut devil magic and officiating fuckery, and it almost became hilarious this year when Mahomes continued to put up the same level of performance but the bullshit was no longer going their way. Last week Collinsworth started glazing Mahomes and his late-game comebacks and then Kelce dropped the ball into the arms of the Texans and the game ended. A part of me wishes Super Bowl LIX hadn’t been called by FOX last year. Hearing Collinsworth or Romo try to cope with the Eagles putting Mahomes in hell might have been worth it.
Mahomes is dead for now. He tore his ACL and his LCL and underwent surgery to repair them. Estimates for return are still the usual 9 months. 9 months puts Mahomes right at September at the presumed earliest. Knowing Mahomes, he will probably be “ready” week 1. He’s a trooper and possessed of the same ultra-competitive sickness that all the GOATs have. I have no doubts he’ll do everything right, get the best treatment money can buy, and be ready. Will he be the same guy in September? My guess is no. He probably won’t scramble as much for a while. But I would be shocked if he doesn’t start week 1, and we are going to have to suffer all the comeback glazing that comes with it.
For the time being both announcers will have to pivot to the other guy taking up full gigabytes in their gooning folders: Josh Allen. At least Josh Allen is still a really fun watch. Allen has managed to retain that magical chaos in his performances and he doesn’t have the burden of being an overexposed champion. I also wouldn’t be surprised if both guys just keep bringing Mahomes up anyway because they just can’t stop popping boners for him.
Very well argued indeed. For me, it was Joe Buck’s incessant glazing (good word, that) of the Packers and Rodgers a few years ago. It didn’t matter if they played like limp hamster dicks, he had a huge Packers bias that necessitated shutting off the sound and tuning in the radio play by play of the opposing team. I would love to save up five gallons of piss and pour it over his head if it wasn’t a waste of perfectly good piss.
Thatsgoodsports….now that’s a name I haven’t heard in a long time. Might need to check it out. I unsubbed around 5 years ago when his content became more….”content creator” in style (or one might argue content mill), with lots of other featured “content creators”. He was best when it felt like just a dude who wants to talk about football, albeit with high production value (sort of like Draw Play. Dave just likes doing this. It’s not about chasing clout). It got too meta and too “content creator”. Zipping through thumbnails and video titles it seems like he might be back to his old style again.
I can’t even remember when I started watching him, but I wanna say it’s been at least 5 years, so I’m not sure if I can usefully agree or disagree about his style of content changing, but I haven’t perceived any seismic shift, for what little that’s worth. I usually laugh at his videos, outside of his team-ups with Tom Grossi on GPS and ClickBaitSports, which I avoid like the plague. I’ll admit it’s something of a minority-opinion, but I loathe Tom Grossi. I’d rather have to hear Scooter’s insane rants about the Cowboys than watch Grossi.
I wouldn’t go so far as loathe, but yeah, Tom Grossi is not my favorite for sure.
I knew I should have just kept my mouth shut, lol. I don’t want to push Perna aside for Grossi, but fine, since more than one of you asked, here’s my word vomit on Grossi. So the main reason I use the word “loathe” instead of “lost interest in” is because my experience has been much the same as Dave’s when he criticizes a QB… the Stans come out and defend. I’ve had a few weird interactions with “The Grossi Posse,” to the point that now I REAAAAAALLY don’t like him, lol.
I subscribed and watched his content for, I dunno, maybe a year or two, and then mostly I just got bored of it and started eye rolling more than I was laughing.
– You could die of alcohol poisoning if you play the “LESSSS F@#%G GOOOOOO!” drinking game with him. During livestreams, he just repeats it ad nauseum, which on the one hand, is fine. I scream “F@&# YOU AND GO TO HELL!” nonstop during Giants games, but I don’t let other people watch me. XD
– His skits are one-dimensional and repetitive. Even initially funny characters, like Wildflower, wear thin. Content felt regurgitated after a while, and I think he drastically overestimates how good of a writer/actor he is. Mistletoe Murders on The Hallmark Channel features better writing and acting, lol.
– This one is admittedly not a huge deal, as many of us fall into this bucket, but it still turned me off. He is *exceptionally* deluded when it comes to the Packers. Jordan Love’s rookie year, he was already proclaiming they found the next coming and rubbing it in Bears fans’ faces. I’m sorry, if you are chest-thumping and bragging about your QB during their ROOKIE SEASON… you’re stupid. (I’ve said Dart looks like he’s going to be a solid answer at QB a few times, but not ONCE have I laughed about him being the next coming of Jesus. I’ll do that next year, right before he dies of a concussion on the field and ascends to Heaven). *AHEM* Yea, so I watched a few Giants/Packers games on Grossi’s stream over the years, and the dude’s overconfidence was borderline intolerable. When the Giants beat the Packers in London a season or two ago, his whole postgame rant was how much of a fluke it was, the Packers were CLEARLY the better team, blah blah blah blah BLAAAAAAH. Whiney whine.
– Here’s the one I usually get the most grief about from people, and on the one hand, I understand why. As a general rule, I do NOT like people whose virtue signaling of their charitable behaviors ALMOST exceeds the actual charitable behavior. Mr. Beast did it, and oh, look, it turns out he did it all for his own selfish gain, and he may be a scam artist and charlatan to boot. Oh, wow. I’m shocked. Really. I’m just not sure it’s any different for Grossi. I don’t necessarily think he’s a scam artist, and his whole stadiums tour raised a pretty good amount of money, but I’m skeptical because it did JUST as much to enhance his own image. I’m assuming this isn’t a repeat of The Completionist, who spent years raising money for charity and then, oh, look, it never got donated! So we’ll assume it’s all ACTUALLY gone to charity… in which case, that’s great. Really, it is. But it sure did a lot to boost his own standing. Is a selfish fame-starved youtuber using charity to climb the ladder something we should look down on in society? On the one hand, helping is helping, so I guess it’s ok since it moves society inexorably forward a few steps. But as a general rule of thumb, I don’t trust people who use charitable actions in a self-boosting manner. I’m not saying I’m the most charitable person, but if I create a charity program that just-so-happens to get me a rather hefty promotion at work, you should be skeptical.
I don’t know a ton about his charity program, but I have to kind of agree on the “virtue signaling” if you want to call it that on a different front. A lot of his content seems to be mocking strawmen characters to make himself seem like the morally superior person for making the skit.
“If the NFL was scripted” is a good example. It basically just exists to mock anyone who raises very real concerns about the competitive integrity of the games, and make him seem like the morally pure fan for believing that everything is fine. Obviously no one believes there’s a literal script, but he creates this strawman idea to punch. All the while letting him seem superior to those who (correctly in my opinion) raise concern about competitive integrity, officiating, and fairness in the league. Which is not an insane conspiracy theory, it seems like we can’t go more than 5 years without the NBA having a massive scandal on this front.
Loathe? That’s pretty strong. Pray do tell, why do you despite the grossi posse so much, especially since Tom ain’t a bad guy?
Loathe? That’s pretty strong. Pray do tell, why do you hate him so much?
Oh, shit ignore that “anonymous” comment. That’s a comment i put because I forgot to fill in my account name.
Blueberries we dont agree on a lot but I also think Grossi is severely overrated. He seems like a good guy but I have never found his stuff interesting or funny
Perna is the only one I watch consistently from that group. I like his stuff the best. Tree has his moments. The only one I actively dislike is scooter
His scripted videos are great, but his reaction videos kinda suck.
Seems we have similar tastes in this regard, Dave.
Likewise, I only really watch Perna and Tree. (and one more guy, though admittedly the third guy is more for comic value than informative value, even if he does mention some nice points time to time)
Grossi’s stuff I might occasionally check when recommended but I generally don’t watch, not very interesting for me.
Don’t even know who this ‘Scooter’ guy is.
“Scooter” is Scooter Magruder, who I also find annoying. He is a massive Dallas homer to the point of delusion and will take over conversations with Grossi, Perna, Tree, and FivePointsVids just to steer them towards the Cowboys.
Grossi’s great on Clickbait whenever he has to shoot down Scooter during one of his “This is our year!” rants, dude is a straight up sniper. (An example, Scooter’s mic is acting up and sounds like shit while he’s whining about some loss, asks what happened to his team, and Tom just casually says “Your defense played as bad as your microphone sounds.”) Though this has been replaced as of late with Tree playing Cope-A-Cabana.
Not a sportscaster, just a sports talk idiot, but I still feel that Nick Wright also belongs in this comic.
I don’t feel he does, because he’s actually a Chiefs fan. I can and do find it exceedingly annoying that he will slobber over everything the Chiefs and Mahomes do but it’s at least coming from a fan perspective which makes it more forgivable in my book.
Not too much more, though.
I feel like Collinsworth at least glazes most good QBs. While Romo only deepthroats Mahomes (and Allen to a lesser degree).
…Well, this was not the content I was expecting upon seeing ‘Glazers’ in the comic title.
For a moment, I thought ‘Whoa, has something happened with the Buccaneers? But I thought they were still alive in the playoff hunt? Wait, are the Glazers going to be forced to sell the team for some reason?’ and so on.
Couldn’t be more off the mark lol.
I like Collinsworth (especially his analysis he had in his days with Inside the NFL which I watched weekly before NFL became oversaturated on TV), but his glazing over the big star QBs is embarrassing. Romo is worse.
It is odd to say but Brady might be the best color guy atm. Aikman has improved too over the last couple of years, especially when it comes to him openly disagreeing with officials.
Aikman and Buck are so good now. Not sure if it’s the big contracts, the network switch, or them just getting old and not giving a fuck but I look forward to MNF now, whereas I couldn’t stand the weekly 4:30 cowboys vs seahawks games on FOX.