Whelp, it’s official. We are at 17 games now. I hate it.

It feels like a half measure. The league was too cowardly to go for a full 18 week season so they are instead giving us this incremental measure instead. We are officially losing one preseason game to make room for it, which is fine by me. The season starts and ends later now, and now the super bowl will be well into February. Goodell has apparently used the fact that most injuries happen in preseason as part of the reasoning, which sounds stupid to me. Last year had no preseason and everyone got hurt in weeks 1-2 instead. Removing preseason games doesn’t make preseason injuries go away, it just moves those injuries to the regular season instead. Can’t wait to see who gets 49ers’d this year. Although actually having training camps and such this year should help.

Now the NFC and AFC have to alternate years in which one conference gets 9 home games (the extra game added will be cross-conference). It’ll be interesting to see if this ends up having an effect on standings. This is one of the convoluted reasons I hate the 17 week idea: it unbalances the force. Another reason is hate it is that now nobody can go 8-8, the perfect display of football mediocrity. Nobody can enjoy 8-8. 7-9? You can be mad, frustrated, or potentially optimistic about how close you are to crossing over if your team has improved on prior seasons. 9-7? You might make the playoffs there. 8-8? Explicit mediocrity. The Jeff Fisher Special. Now it’s gone. It’ll be 9-8 or 8-9. Gross. Does anyone think that looks as nice? You are either a winner or a loser now. No more perfect, mind numbing mediocrity.

Yes, I suppose 8-8-1 is now possible, but unlikely, and I will enjoy it if it happens.

Thanks to the extra game, we will probably have some records fall soon. Any season accumulation record is now easier to reach. Yardage, TDs, sacks, all of it. When those records get broken, we will now have to add a mental asterisk next to it reminding ourselves that the record is less special because it was now easier to achieve. I wouldn’t be surprised if we lose a couple just this season. I think the NFL should probably keep seasonal records in separate files for the 14, 16, and 17 week seasons, plus the 18 week season when it inevitably arrives.

What annoys me is that I’d have preferred they actually take it one step further and go full 18 games, with 2 preseason games, and an extra second bye week. I really don’t understand why they haven’t added an extra bye week, they should have done that before they added the 17th game. The NFL makes most of their money via TV contracts these days, an extra bye week gives us an extra week of football games without any of the costs added from playing a game. It seems like an easy way to make more money without re configuring schedules and making everything more complicated. Plus, an extra bye week for players! Bye weeks are great for players to rest up on injuries! More bye weeks please! I love the bye week, I get to sit back and relax and watch all the other teams without being stressed by my own stupid one.

But nope, now the players have to deal with an extra week of physical endurance without extra rest to compensate. I wouldn’t be surprised if we start getting into NBA-esque “load management” situations in the coming years with certain older stars. Bleh.

Fine, fine…I’m just mad I have to watch the Giants lose even more. Save me Kenny Golladay.