Divisional Chaos? Barely.


Last year the divisional round was one of the best weekends of football I’d ever seen in my life, from the Bengals knocking out the #1 seeded Titans, the 49ers sending Rodgers home with a blocked punt in frigid Lambeau, Brady going full Brady against the Rams only to get Kupped, ending with the 13 second masterpiece game between Buffalo and Kansas City. This year had a lot to live up to. Hell, last week was pretty great, could it even live up to last week?

No.

This weekend sucked. We had to wait for the 4th game to even witness a lead change. In fact, I’m almost thankful to the 49ers and Cowboys for giving us at least a taste of chaos to send the week out on a note that wasn’t pathetic. Again, let’s start with the least chaos and move to “most”.

GIANTS @ EAGLES
This was just an old-fashioned ass-whooping. The Giants were completely outmatched. I didn’t have much hope for this game and I was still surprised to see how hard they got their shit kicked in. Eagles looked like an unstoppable force and should be the favorites in the championship, if not the whole thing.

BENGALS @ BILLS
I felt like the Bengals were going to win this but I didn’t think it would be so easy. The Bengals went into a snow-covered Buffalo stadium and imposed their will on the Bills. The Bills were early favorites to win it all this season and frankly, they never played like it. Not quite. These Bills felt off. Looking back on the season, this squad was underachieving from the get-go. Maybe that’s a weird critique about a 14-win team, but didn’t they seem sloppy? Looking back at their schedule, they have a few notable wins, and far more that are less impressive in hindsight. The opening game against the Rams? The Rams ended up being pathetic. The Titans? Flawed squad that couldn’t put it together long enough to even win a bad division. They lost to the Vikings (to chaos), the Dolphins, and the Jets. The win over the Chiefs was the best all year, and the rest were mostly against weaker squads or teams that at the time were playing their worst football, like Pittsburgh in week 5. I think they were going to lose the Hamlin game too. They got gifted the benefit of the doubt from that unprecedented event and the Bengals came in angry. But we should have known the Bills were boned when they struggled to truly put away the Patriots and then almost lost the wildcard to Skylar Thompson and the Delay of Gamephins. Dare I say it, maybe Josh Allen needed Brian Daboll. He took a step back. This team goes into the offseason dejected after a good season that feels anything but.

JAGUARS @ CHIEFS
This game probably would have been a bigger blowout if Mahomes hadn’t gotten hurt, which briefly made things interesting. Mahomes was definitely not quite himself after that, but the Chiefs ran the whole field with Chad Henne and kept the Jaguars from ever getting too close. The Jags missed a number of opportunities to get back into it and definitely left some plays on the field, but the Jaguars were also playing with house money and also still have a ways to go. They acquitted themselves with dignity. Now the big question is how much Mahomes is hurt.

COWBOYS @ 49ERS
I wouldn’t say this was a good game, but unlike every other game, it at least was interesting till the end. It was also a great defensive showcase if you are into that. Once again Mike McCarthy saved the day with absolutely wonderful game management. Both QBs looked bad, Brett Maher missed another extra point (it was blocked, but many have noted the kick looked bad from the start anyway), and George Kittle had the best play of the weekend with his triple bobble catch over the middle of the field. The 49ers are so loaded they might genuinely go to the super bowl with a rookie Mr. Irrelevant starting at QB. I’m so interested in what happens to Trey Lance now. On yeah, I guess this is CHAOS OF THE WEEK

GIANTS CORNER:
Well, that’s the wall. Giants’ roster was bereft of talent and it can only work so far and some perspective was needed. An overachieving scrapper rarely has the ability to overcome a bucket of talent on a win-now team going for it all. Every weakness was exposed. The Giants still have a lot of work to do if they want to compete at this level. I’m almost thankful we got sent to the shadow realm, the online Giants fanbase as a whole has gotten extremely Daniel Jones pilled and I am baffled by it. I’m happy with him this year but he’s not the answer yet. The only difference is that now I think he still could be, maybe. In for an interesting offseason for sure. Hard to be too sad with the end, we never should have made it this far to begin with. The most enjoyable season we’ve had since 2011.

MOST UNWATCHABLE GAME OF THE WEEK: I mean unless you were an Eagles fan, or just rooting against the Giants, that game was over on the second drive of the game. Basically a waste of time after that. Giants are also the Disappointment Duck. Not a lot of options at this point.

PICS!

 

Only 3 games left!

49ERS @ EAGLES
Honestly as a true neutral, stepping back from bias as much as possible perspective, this game is a fantastic matchup. Two best teams in the conference by far, and seeing how the creative and loaded Eagles deal with a level of defense they have yet to face is going to be quite a sight. The 49ers are no slouches and Purdy managed to hold off versus the Cowboys excellent defense, but he’s gonna have to do better than that to keep this going. This is a dream matchup for quality football. Watch the game be an unwatchable slog, because that’s how things always go.
If the 49ers win, I will draw Brock Purdy as a goofy unstoppable runaway train
If the Eagles win, I will draw Jalen Hurts as Sam The Eagle snapping the Golden Gate Bridge in half

BENGALS @ CHIEFS
Bengals saw the league make a neutral site, saw the ticket sales, and told everyone to eat shit. The Bengals felt like obvious regression candidates after last year and yet here they are, yet again. This team is for real. I love them. They are probably my preferred champion of the remaining 4 teams. The Chiefs, well, now they get to play the game at home, so that’s nice for them. Unfortunately for them, they now face the one team they cannot seem to beat, and Mahomes may not be 100%. Should be fun!
If the Bengals win, I will draw Ja’marr Chase as the Count from Sesame Street, counting to the number 4, which is how many times the Chiefs have lost to them
If the Chiefs win, I will draw Walrus Andy Reid eating an entire Skyline Chili restaurant