The Regression Of Colin Kaepernick
Aaaaaannnnnnd in the middle of working on this comic I find out Kaepernick is benched for Blaine “WOAH THERE MOTHERFU*KER” Gabbert.
Obviously this comic was based on an actual play that happened in the Rams game (keep your eye on Smith at the bottom) and it’s pretty much Kaepernick’s 2015 season in a nutshell. I don’t know what’s happened to Kaep. I was a big supporter of the dude and I wanted to see him succeed just to stick it to the crusty old white sportswriters of the world. Whatever spark he had two to three years ago is gone. He has regressed to astoundingly poor levels. He is in the running for worst starting QB in the league right now. He just looks utterly broken. He’s never been able to make reads well but now it looks like he’s lost whatever confidence he still had. He used to take shots, now he panics and dumps it off, he’s turned into Kaeptain Checkdown (not sorry). He used to see an opening and run for it like a beautiful gazelle, then kiss his bicep. Now he just takes the sack. He looks like a scared puppy every play and it’s depressing.
Some of the blame can obviously be leveled at the 49ers as a whole. The 49ers have performed exactly as the we all expected after the offseason from hell. Maybe worse than expected. Kaep doesn’t have the talent around him anymore. His O-line isn’t good, Vernon Davis seems to have spent the last two seasons in hibernation seemingly not trying (And he’s gone now too). His coaching is a joke. It’s not nearly all his fault, but he is not the same QB we saw lead a team to a Super Bowl and then to an NFC Championship. He’s not even the same QB as last year. He’s gone full pumpkin. I think his benching is probably a good thing. Maybe it triggers something in Kaep’s brain, puts him back in underdog mode like he was at the beginning, when he played with a fearlessness he currently lacks. I think more likely he’s just done in SF. One or two bad years doesn’t mean the end, but the 49ers are not trending upwards right now and it might be best for both Kaep and San Francisco to move on.
Belichick is going to sign/purchase/assimilate him and turn him into a wide receiver and he’s going to set records or something, watch.
or the Colts will sign him after they finish breaking Luck and they’ll ride Kaep’s resurgence for a couple years until they break him too.
or the Broncos will pick him up and make him Manning’s replacement and he’ll accidentally obliterate a Broncos receiver or two because they’re accustomed to catching Peyton’s wounded ducks and not Kaep’s ballistic missiles.
or, what the hell, the Browns will sign him and finally destroy him.
wait, no, i know where he’s going. he’s going to Kansas City.
C:
How long until Blane Gabbert is a chief?
Kaep is too dumb to learn Andy Reids offense.
The shouting for Kaepernick had already begun in Philly two weeks ago. Now, I wouldn’t be surprised if it turns deafening. It’s hard to imagine Kaep looking worse than Bradford.
I could see a number of teams being very interested in him. If you’re the Bills or Browns, or yes, the Eagles, what do you have to lose throwing him a one year contract if/when the Niners cut him this off-season ? He’s done more in his career than the other options currently available.
Well, the Bills actually already have a solid mobile QB in Tyrod Taylor. When he’s healthy. That’s the rub. (Bills fan here pulling for him. 8 yards per attempt, 70% accuracy rating and a 2:1 TD:INT ratio is better than anything Kaep put out last year or this year)
But when he’s hurt…man, it says something that it’s hard to say who is the worse backup, EJ Manuel or Matt Cassel. Kaep would be an upgrade there.
it’s hard to say who is the worse backup, EJ Manuel or Matt Cassel.
Jimmy Clausen is still collecting an NFL paycheck.
Landry Jones claimed that hill two weeks ago.
Niner fan here. It’s amazing how quickly York has ruined this team
True. It’s almost like he’s trying to make them the worst. It’s as if he has a diabolical plan of some sort. Maybe he wants to move them to L.A. It doesn’t make sense but neither does anything else he’s done.
He wants us to become Raider fans apparently
Prepare yourselves for Blaine “The Pain Train” Gabbert. PREPARE.
1. “Gone full pumpkin” is my new favorite phrase for someone falling to crap.
2. Wouldn’t it be something if Gabbert manages to not be terrible? Guy had all the potential in the world, maybe a change of scenery and a few years more experience will cure him of the jitters under pressure that ruined him in Jacksonville.
3. This is all the more reason that a Philly-San Fran trade for Kaep needs to happen. If anyone in the league can fix Kaep, it’d be Chip, and it just makes too much sense for everyone involved.
4. Looking at Torrey Smith jumping around down there, then looking at Steve Smith Sr. tear his achilles, I can’t help but feel like both the Ravens and Smith sorely regret parting ways.
That bleacher report link was cancer. HOLY SHIT. Nearly destroyed my phone!
Oh yes, main event time! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=09oUUhkSxbQ
This was all lies and Nazi propaganda to demoralize our faith in American heroes.
Holy crap. Smith couldn’t have been any more wide open if he was a centerfold in Hustler.
More like Colon Krapernick!
I’m sad there wasn’t one more panel with tomsula on the sideline holding his forehead and saying ” you’ve got to be frigging kiddin me”
HEY JED
HEY JED
I’LL FUCKING KILL YOU JED
Soooo glad my Jags are Gabbert free. I didn’t think he’d ever find a job in the NFL after Jacksonville cut him, but somehow he got traded. Traded!
49ers fans be warned. It is about to get really really ugly.
Amazing that in recent memory, Kaepernick was making Clay Matthews, a legitimately great defender, look completely hapless in a playoff game. I have no clue what happened to him – 3 years ago he looked like he was always the best athlete on the field, and when he threw the ball, despite his sort of weird mechanics, it was crazy how much stronger his arm looked than the rest of the league.
It seemed like he was a little bit of polishing and little bit of learning how to not always throw it a jillion miles an hour away from being the next big thing. Now he’s been replaced by Yo Gabba Gabbert.
And to all those who think that Chip Kelly is the answer, I’m just not sure that a guy like Kaepernick would jive with Chip’s fascist reign in Philly. I think the possible skillset might make sense but I just don’t see them being able to get along.
When I first saw these news, my first thought was that the 49ers were tanking the season. Kaepernick is pretty bad, but there’s no way he’s worse than Blaine “benched for motherfucking Chad Henne” Gabbert.
It’s not only that Kaepernick is bad, but the leaks and rumors that have surrounded him are also putting him in a position to lose. There are reports saying that Kaepernick would have been benched sooner, but they want Gabbert to look better against a “softer Falcons defense”, and have Kap thrown to the wolves of STL and SEA.
This article tells all:
http://www.ninersnation.com/2015/11/3/9661754/we-knew-colin-kaepernicks-days-were-numbered-but-49ers-should-have-handled-this-better
They could start Gabbert against the Browns’ second-string defence and he’d still look bad.
Maybe Harbaugh was a good QB coach before everyone in SF turned on him. Nah, can’t be it.