The Draw Play

THANK YOU TO EVERYONE WHO SENT IN A PUP! I ended up getting enough for a full roster. I’m sure some of you might have been expecting me to do a doodle for every dog, but that is far too many dogs, and it took hours to compile what I did get into this post. I believe I fit every pup into this team, so if you sent an email and don’t see your pooch on the squad, I apologize. Either something got lost in the mail or during my many many downloads while I tried to keep everything tracked.

Naturally, dogs are kind of designed to be linebackers, running backs, and receivers, and dogs come in all shapes and sizes, so this isn’t going to be a perfect correlation to every position. Folks sent in varying degrees of information as well, some offered me plenty of detail on the dog’s breed, temperament, and skills and other folks just sent a pic and I had to sort of invent the dog’s backstory. But hey, here’s your chance to see your pup and the pups of your fellow readers!

I will be taking the rest of the week off after this, mostly because after a busy season I need a small break to get done some other things. But with that out of the way, lets look at our team!

Border Collies are the confirmed smartest dog breed. That naturally makes them a perfect fit for the most difficult position in all of doggy sports. Nobody can field direct a squad like a dog built to corral large herds. Dexter, our beautiful QB1, is for sure the smartest dog I’ve personally met and an absolute stud, as well as being appropriately full of himself. Pollack is 5 months old. I think he’s going to do great things, but he needs to ride the bench for a year or two first.

 

It’s not easy to find a franchise left tackle, but I think we’ve got one in the massive 125lb Olly. This absolute anchor is going to stop any dog from getting by, and he’s only 1 year old! Imagine him in his prime! Covering the other end is Buddy, a Chow/Samoyed, so he’s built to pancake. Look at that fuzz, how do defenders know how to get past all that floof? In the center we have Odin, an excellent shepherd who is disciplined enough to control the line of scrimmage, and he’s flanked by Missy and Ollie. Missy is young but has all the physical attributes, and Ollie, despite being a bit undersized, has veteran savvy and an ton of experience and energy. He absolutely hates anyone who isn’t his people. If you hit Dexter late, Ollie is going to knock you out.

 

Runningback is a prime position for dogs but also a malleable one. Any dog on this list could likely fill in, but I think we have a solid committee here. Pebbles is notorious for not letting anything go once it’s in her mouth. Poppy the lurcher is a solid vet presence with plenty of vision and quickness. Thor is our change of pace back, you’ll never see him and if you think you’d tackled him, it turns out you just grabbed fuzz. Echo is shy, but always falls forward for yardage. A superb short yardage solution.

 

Bodie is a retired racing greyhound. He may not have the route running skills of Baleia or Olallie, but there’s no one faster. Al Davis would be proud. Stick Bodie on a post route and if you throw it blindly at the endzone, chances are he’s already there. Baleia is our small possession receiver, and Olallie is just straight up unstoppable. Mel and Marshal are reliable and tough and know exactly how to get free so you can hit them in the paws.

 

Luna is my dog, and she is the most tight end of all dogs. She’s a bruiser, loves contact, and will fight anyone. But she’s not all gruff, she’s also finesse, and can grab toys as high as 6 feet in the air off her springy back legs. For a little more grace and a little less bite, Livy is our gal. Luna is a blocker, Livy is a catcher. Livy is also the team heartthrob and you’ll always see girls in the stands cooing and trying to get her to come over. Stanley is pure attitude and never met a defensive end he couldn’t chip before he snuck into the flat for a first down.

 

Nobody is running on us. Nobody. Not with these powerhouses locking down the middle. Call us the Steel Furrton. Fletcher, a Bernese/Malamute, is a wall of fuzz and fury that nobody wants to block. Stella? Ferocious. Mugs? You know Mugs. Everyone loves Mugs. Mugs has been an absolute terror everywhere Mugs goes. Sheba? You might not see it in that photo, but I have it on good authority this tank of a dog has stolen a lot of lean cuisines and was raised in the department of corrections, so there’s nobody tougher. Kiwi? You might think a Pom is too small for an interior lineman, but you know who else was considered a bit small for the position coming out of college? Aaron Donald. Enough said.

 

Pups who just love to wreak havoc. Look at Finn. Finn’s a bad boy. Finn has an entire section of fans at every game. Finn is going to get your QB. Just accept it. Think you got Finn locked down? Bad news, Gracie just came from the other side. Gracie doesn’t take no shit. Gracie was made for this. Ryuk is a specialist with the spin move, making everything think he’s chasing his tail but boom! He just flew past ya. Toby is our good boy in the power package and nobody plays the run as well as the Tobester. Mollie is young, has a ton of promise, but needs to learn a bit of discipline because she keeps jumping offsides and peeing a little every time she gets excited.

 

Here come our corps. Look at them. Blue chip players all. Kelly? A Jack Russell, which you know means this coverage specialist has everyone covered at all times. You wont find a better middle linebacker than Lexi, a dog of experience and attitude. Mia’s the trash talker, but she backs it up. Stitch is the quiet killer, you might even forget he’s there and then suddenly you are on the ground and the ball is out. Domino is the fresh face of the squad and learning fast, an excellent blitzer. Our leader and veteran presence, Hank? Hank is dank.

 

A great place for the small, annoying dogs of our group. You don’t have to be big to play CB, you just have to stay with your man. Elsie is the dreamboat, Milo is the ballhawk, Monty is the speedster who can cover any post route, Thor has perfect discipline and never bites on a fake. Zoe is the best man cover corner in the game today, never letting go once you get covered. Aztec needs to cut down on the interference calls, but you wont see anyone bat down a ball better then he does.

 

Our stalwart final line of defense. Led by our boy Tillman, you cannot let him go for the ball, because once he gets a wiff, he’s taking it. Tinkerbell is so full of energy, 3 down player and covers centerfield. Barley is our rookie, but he’s doing great things in the box offering run support. Raymond is the perfect blitz. You think he’s going to be afraid of you, but then all of a sudden he’s in your arms giving you licks. Lucy Fur is just…stupendous. Look at her. Every WR gets lost in her eyes. But even if you can get past all those pups, you wont get past Cooper. Part beagle, part devil. Cooper is built for tracking things down. He can sniff out a play before you’ve even called it.

 

Wally is an excellent punter, Paxton makes every field goal count, and when you are receiving the kick, look out. Sammie is going to blow you up every time.

 

No team is complete without their old veteran leaders! Tulo is an old-school coach. He takes no shit, offers no love, but by golly you’ll adore him and run through a brick wall for him. Prince was an incredible talent and former WR who met with an unfortunate leg injury, but has made a name for himself as a superb play-caller and a great mentor to Bodie. Maggie is rough, Maggie is gruff, Maggie wants the ball and she’s going to teach every defender how to take it. Everyone respects this 14 year old living legend. Of course, the team was expertly built by Seva, the most talented GM in the league. Excellent at roster construction and salary cap management, he makes sure our stars get their treats and stay wagging.

The less is said about Bucky the better. Many have questioned Bucky’s credentials and there are rumors Bucky is not even a dog. Nobody know how this suspicious character found his way into the front office and purred in the owners ear. The fans are skeptical and they have every right to be. Something’s up with this fella.

Thank you so much for sending in your pups! Have a great week everyone!