THE 2024 DRAFT CARDS
Ready and willing to be gawked at! Hope you like pokemon and freakish horrors!
Will be updated with stragglers I had pre-drawn who get picked up in rounds 2 and below after the draft is over.
What was your reaction to your team so far? Me? Im personally happy with Nabers. I don’t know who the hell is going to throw to him, but maybe we can figure that out next year since we are stuck with Jones for one more season anyway. I did not want JJ McCarthy at 6. Maybe McCarthy will be okay but I feel like that would have been a bad fit. He’s better off in Minnesota.
The Falcons though, what the fuck? Michael Penix? Right after tampering to get Kirk Cousins from the Vikings and giving him a huge deal, you draft the oldest QB prospect in the draft at #8? What the fuck are you doing? I like Penix! I want him to do well! He’s also old, why would you waste his valuable rookie contract years sitting behind a now blindsighted and angry expensive Cousins? The team has a lot of holes and there was so many quality picks available, especially on defense. The Falcons might be a new regime but it’s the same old shit.
The Bears killed it, getting Williams and Odunze is incredible. God we can only hope the void of dark energy that is Chicago offense doesn’t smother them.
EDIT: I got sick with a stomach bug on Sunday so you’ll have to settle for having the updated and complete 2024 cards instead of a comic. All the remaining pictures I had drawn prior to round 1 have been added.
This was defiantly a weirder Draft. I feel that most of these QBs should have been day 2 or day 3 guys. Hope everyone succeeds though (unless they are human garbage). I’m officially old though as I am either one year younger or the exact same age as them. I feel like I wasted my life
hehe wait til you begin to notice that all these rookies have freaking baby faces.
/me feeds Mel Kiper a golden raspberry and stuffs him back into a pokeball for another year.
Brock Bowers is just so good. Top notch stuff and the perfect weird compliment to an already-weird draft! Were there any surprises you had to quickly get out on-the-spot? Can’t imagine you had Ricky Pearsall in the chamber!
Brock Bowers to the Raiders was probably one of the worst picks the organization since… Alex Leatherwood? Brock Bowers is an incredible player but just a horrible pick for the raiders. Never mind they have no quarterback and they should have traded up, but they have DAVANTE ADAMS, and DALTON KINCAID WHO IS 24 AND THEIR 2023 FIRST ROUND PICK. I love Brock Bowers as he is probably the best player in this class maybe other than Caleb Williams so all I hope is he doesn’t have the same fate as the other Raiders first round picks.
Oh don’t get me wrong, I agree with you! That was a head scratcher….lol I was talking about Dave drawing Brock Bowers literally as the character Brock from Pokemon. That’s just perfect!
Dalton Kincaid? The TE for the Bills? Also who would you have had them pick at QB? They would have had to trade up for any of the top 6 QBs. They weren’t going to be able to trade for Williams. They amount they would have had to trade for Maye or Daniels would have been too high. The other three 1st round QBs were too flawed to spend even more capital to trade up and get them. Like I’m a Raiders fan and would have loved for them to get a QB, but there was no way without sending away a ton of picks/assets.
The lack of football is getting to me.
My mistakes I got Mayer and Kincaid mixed up. Mayer was the 35th pick too. BUT MY POINT STILL STANDS.
I would like to thank the other NFL teams for once again letting the Eagles pick up who they needed.
technically, Bonix is older then Penix
I know this is probably not the actual reason, but I can’t get the notion out of my head that the Falcons took Penix to spite the Broncos over a Super Bowl they lost 25 years ago.
I don’t know anything about college football. Bo Nix can’t be any worse than where our QB situation was before, right?
He’s an Oregon QB, a school known for only generating NFL caliber quarterbacks if the Chargers draft them. (Or Norm Van Brocklin, but Chargers didn’t exist when he was drafted).
He’s not bad but definitely the worst out of the “big 6.” He sort of got exposed as being a checkdown merchant and that combined with his age and the talent he had at Oregon tanked his stock pretty hard. But to answer your question, nothing is getting much worse than zach wilson so
Only one I was surprised by was Maye. There isn’t a dragon Pokémon?
It will be funny to see who is around in 5 years.
McCarthy was the QB I desperately wanted the Vikings NOT to draft. Minnesota needs a QB that’s used to handling the adversity that comes with the Vikings doing their usual Vikings BS late in the season, not a guy who was surrounded by so much talent at Michigan that he could afford to make mistakes. We need a QB with that same 4th quarter superpower as Eli Manning, basically.
He’s got a lot of talent and knows how to scramble when needed. He just didn’t need to at Michigan. Once he gets a few loses, I’m hoping he gets fired up and wants to make it to that next level to taste sweet success again. He’s got a decent coaching staff under him and doesn’t seem to have ingrained bad habits. He could work.
Yeah, this is just copium. None of the QBs in the draft are really ready to be dropped right away into MN chaos. We just have to hope he has the capacity to learn via the adversity.
Brock Bowers
Malickatongue
Bonix
not all of them were winners (rarely are with a forced theme), but those 3 made it all worth while
Dave, do you ever get any feedback from the players themselves after they see their draft day cards?
I doubt most even come across them. I’d wager most of the players I draw are not reading twitter timelines during draft night and they probably don’t see them afterward. The only one I can for sure confirm saw theirs was Lane Johnson, who used it as his Twitter profile for a while and followed me when I tweeted at him that I drew his card.
I’ve been doing this long enough that I wonder if anyone who found me when they were younger and became an NFL first rounder would actively anticipate their card, but I think that’s also a low chance since my fanbase mostly sticks in my age range and all the new kids are younger and I have more of a nerdy online following.
Shout our to AEW owner Tony Kahn selling his neck injury in the Jaguars war room with a neck brace
I had fun watching Bills fans reactions to them trading down to the Chiefs of all teams. It was like they got ‘Nam flashbacks.
Drake Maye should be cast into mount doom
I’m disappointed that the cards are all normal energy cards. Sad
bonix and brock bowers back to back is the greatest duo in this list
I just found out Joe Alt and I went to the same high school. Granted, he was in diapers when I graduated, but it’s still neat that my little school produced a high draft pick.
Missed an opportunity for Spencer Ratticate or Rattata. SMH.