Jordan Matthews Gets Traded
Oh Buffalo. You snowy train wreck you. You replace Sammy Watkins with Jordan Matthews and then Jordan Matthews immediately cracks his sternum.
I guess the Bills are tanking it this year. Can’t let the Jets have all the fun, I suppose. It makes some sense. The Bills are a mediocre team at best right now, and they just got a new coach and GM who likely have new ideas on how to run things. Jettison the old regime’s ideals, gather some picks, get a few basics in place and sacrifice the season for the future. That’s basically been the entire MO so far.
-Lowball Tyrod to make sure they aren’t tied down to him in the future
-Trade talented but injured Sammy Watkins to the Rams
-Replace Watkins with a much lesser but meh talent who can at least catch a ball in Jordan Matthews. Obviously they didn’t intend for him to suffer a cracked sternum, but shit happens.
-Trade for EJ Gaines, a good CB
-Give up Ronald Darby, a good CB
-Get a 2nd and a 3rd round pick in the two major trades
-Trade Cardale Jones for a 7th
I can’t tell if I like it or if I think it’s going to work, but I do like that there is clearly a plan in place right now. Sean McDermott obviously has some sort of long term vision and it makes me interested to see what the Bills do these comings seasons. This season though? A wash. A waste. LeSeasn McCoy will do a few things. Tyrod will have some fun plays. They have Anquan Boldin for a highlight or two. Richie Incognito will be a shit and the fans will love him anyway because Bills solidarity. Baccari Rambo is still an elite name.
And of course the Bills fans will continue to be the trashiest, most insane fanbase in football. Everyone I’ve ever met who has gone to a Bills game has a Bills fan story. I guess when you live in Buffalo there isn’t much else to do besides get messed up at a tailgate. I suppose I can respect that. Keep on having sex in the parking lot, Bills fans. Gotta make new Bills fans somehow. Plus, “Your Dad and me met when he smashed my ex through a folding table and then fell off the upper deck, and then we went at it over behind the nearest RV” is a hell of a conception story.
next comic is #700!
Yeah…the last week has been rough. We Bills fans had been psyching ourselves up for “look, ok, we’re mediocre again this year, but we now play Cutler with the Dolphins, the tanking Jets, and hey Brady ruins everyone”
Trading Sammy and Darby are sure signs that we will be worse this year. This got confirmed in preseason last night, and it was rubbed in our face in the second preseason game when Darby just destroyed whoever he covered vs his old team. Tyrod Taylor, the QB, without Sammy or any real strong #1 option went 8 for 18 for 53 yards and 2 interceptions.
It’s infuriating, because the defense looks so much better. The Eagles run game could do nothing. At one point in the night, the Eagles were 0 for 6 on third down and had turned it over or punted on 5 series. McCoy is still one of the best backs in the game. And this year likely won’t even be a playoff run.
My only consolation is that 2 1st round picks (at least one likely in the top 10), 2 seconds, and 2 thirds is a lot of trade bait if they really are going to take a swing at a rookie.
*sigh* Now excuse me while I commit unspeakable acts at a Bills tailgate to drown my sorrows.
Dude they were 0 for 9! The D looked incredible.
Its that o-line. Henderson and Ducacasse are basically pylons out there. While Tyrod is no Brady, there was one play where I think Mills literally was thrown off his feet in about 2 seconds. This needs to be addressed.
I am sure Dennison is gonna give Tyrod more PA boots and things to help with his mobility. He simply isn’t a pocket passer.
Also Dave you’re damn right we all love Big Cog up here. He’s one of the coolest guys ever and he’s an elite left tackle.
As a Dolphins fan who used to love Incognito, you’re going to regret those words. Also he’s a tackle now?
Worth noting, when we picked him up Terry Pegula spoke to him personally. The gist of the conversation was “This is your last shot at football, clean up your act.”
So far he has.
He’s also in his mid-thirties, he’s not long for football anyway. Plus he’s got mental health issues, along with alcohol abuse problems. He seems like another big problem waiting to happen.
My bad. Left guard. He’s an elite lineman anyway. Why do you guys hate him? That bully thing was overrated.
Bullygate was a dumb overblown thing, according to conspiracy theorists it was the NFL’s attempt to throw the scent off the mental health problems of both Martin and Incognito (if it was good job it really worked). The fact of the matter is that he was part of something that ruined a season and the fallout wrecked the relationship between Philbin and Tannehill, which ended up wasting two more seasons.
But if this was it the only reason I’d have to hate Incognito would be that he’s a Bill. The main reason I hate him is the incident where he molested a woman at a charity golf event, and I still find it amazing that no one seems to remember that or hold it against him if they do.
Yeah my girlfriend came home just after the 0 for 6 got announced so my attention got distracted after that. I have to say, I really wish we had Sammy because the D looks really, really good. I’m a little worried about playing some, but the run D looks lights out and the back end is looking “bend don’t break”
I’ve been indifferent to the Bills since they went with Rob Johnson over Doug Flutie and got Music City Miracled. I tepidly cheer for them now because I want someone in their division to challenge the Patriots and I went to high school with LeSean McCoy and I’d like to see his talent not wasted on the eternal mediocrity that is the Bills. I sigh as it looks like it will be another year of the same.
Watch Buffalo somehow pull 10-6 out of their asses with a new coach like last Miami last year and the Jets in 2015.
The most Billsy thing possible is to do just well enough to suck.
I was close
I went to the storm game this past monday. Here’s a link to a playlist of me: https://m.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLxatORgsVMJX_7bzpGbYZF5P9mZ0DJQ2L
P.S. I forgot to charge my phone to get highlights from the Philly vs. Baltimore game. Philly won 69-54. Lol 69.
My god, Doug Pederson is just worst than Chip Kelly.
I felt the same way after that choke job by the Yankees last night.
…yeah
Well, we do have Nathan Peterman though. The kid has looked really good so far
NVP!
Not going to lie, I want to see Shady traded. His career is just wasting away now on a rebuild that is going to take at least two years to make the team at least an 8-8 team and there is no guarantee that they’ll even get there. Just ask the Jet’s, they have been rebuilding since Super Bowl 3.
Philly is worse then Buffalo…
Annnnnddddd, now Boldin is gone as well. Us Bills fans are losing players to watch on a daily basis now. I always keep my hopes in check with Buffalo, but damn, this year I may not have any real reason to watch. At least I’ll be more productive on Sundays I guess.
Is anyone else really pissed off how easy the Patriots seem to have the division locked down this year?
Aaaaand Boldin just retired. Not ajoke.
Will the next comic have a eclipse reference?
what tyrod you talking about Dave? because Taylor went to the browns
whoa, got caught in a time vortex and thought this was the current comic…my bad
Hello