Some clickbait pop culture site published a rumor that Tom Brady was considering getting into standup comedy. I did not believe this for a single second, and I’m pretty sure it was already debunked, so don’t get excited. He could not possibly be that dumb.

That said, man, imagine how incredible that would be. It would be the most divorced man thing he could possibly do. A man who has spent the better part of two decades living the life of a complete superstar without any ability to relate to the common man going up there and trying to tell us jokes at age 45 for the first time. It would have been a sight. It’s not like he’s not funny or couldn’t get off any zingers, he has charisma. But that particular field? It would be a massacre. His audience would be made up of 2 kinds of people: Tom Brady fans, who will cheer and laugh at anything he does, and Tom Brady haters, who will boo mercilessly.

It would also be fascinating to see how the move would get received by the standup community. If you’ve ever seen or read stuff by comedians about the behind-the-scenes culture of standup, it is a toxic, depressing place. They are primarily deeply angry, bitter people scraping by because they aren’t well known or incredibly full of themselves because they “made it”. They all band together and support each other, yet also resent anyone who succeeds. I have to imagine the community would not welcomely receive some 45yr old superstar who is already extremely famous suddenly coming in and stealing shows and getting Netflix specials simply off the back of his celebrity status that he did not earn via comedy.

Man, what a world that would have been. He 100% would have done a special with Chappelle and the discourse would have been horrific. Anyway, he’s still get bodied by Eli Manning.