The Colts Do Not Spark Joy
You know how a week ago I went and claimed the Dolphins had the worst vibes entering the 2025 season? I would like to amend my opinion. It’s the Colts.
Jim Irsay is dead. The Colts went and signed Daniel Jones to be Anthony Richardson’s backup/competition, and as of Tuesday, Jones has been named the starter. This reaffirms something I believe most of us already believed: this regime is hosed. They are fucked fucked. It’ll be a miracle of patience from the new owner (Irsay’s daughter) to not fire all of these losers by January. Steichen? He’s gone. Ballard? He should have been gone years ago. Everyone else? Enjoy your trip to the sun. This shit is so over.
I went back and read my original thoughts on Danny to Indy and I am pleasantly surprised to see I called Danny having a good chance at the starting job right out of the gate. I didn’t think he actually would be the starter (barring injury – which is still kind of true since Richardson hurt his finger), but I knew he’d probably be better than Richardson. I figured this Colts regime is unfortunately tied to Richardson so even if Jones beat him in camp AR would still get the nod and Jones would get thrown in there until AR proved so bad that Steichen got desperate to save his ass. If Jones is getting the start already…Steichen is already trying to save his ass. The two biggest wildfires in the country are under Daboll and Steichen’s asses.
It makes me wonder how bad Richardson is and how much the staff is tired of him. Jones did not play meaningfully better than Richardson in the two preseason games. Richardson still has shit mechanics and makes bad decisions. Jones can at least process things since he’s a veteran but still makes terrible throws and bad decisions. I saw nothing on the field that seemed to justify giving Daniel Jones the keys over the player who is supposedly still the future, who needs reps, who gives some fans hope (even when it’s mostly cope). So how much does Richardson suck…off the field? Jones, for all his faults, is a great guy and a professional. His teammates liked him in New York even as he threw the team into the dirt. Richardson famously took himself off the field last year for fatigue and was dumb enough to publicly admit it. He might have bad vibes. He might be a shit leader who has lost the respect of everyone there. I’m willing to bet it’s the off-field stuff that won Jones the gig.
I think Steichen will land on his feet and go on to be a good coordinator again. Ballard is the true monster here. Since their Luck ran out, the Colts have had a QB band-aid approach that would rival the Browns Hydra on a short-term basis. Jacoby Brisset. Brian Hoyer. Philip Rivers. Carson Wentz. Matt Ryan. Sam Ehlinger. Nick Foles. Gardner Minshew. Anthony Richardson. Joe Flacco. Now Daniel Jones. Only the final year rental of Rivers worked at all. Makes you wince. The rest of the roster hasn’t fared much better as the team has largely crumbled since the Luck era. This team needs to clean house. If I were a Colts fan, I’d invest more time into my other hobbies this season. Now’s a good time to finally learn that skill you’ve been putting off.
EDIT: The Monday Comic will be up tomorrow as I was in transit most of Sunday
Missed opportunity to have the AFC Finalist banner hanging on his wall.
I love the series of Payton forehead pictures.
Those had me cackling
Walter Payton?
So good!!
The Colts are taking for Arch since the Colts are NFL welfare-babies
Definitely not a good year to be a Colts fan. It’s been almost 20 years since their last Lombardi, however I’d still rather be a Colts fan than a fan of the Cowboys, Browns, or a few other teams.
Love the Peyton picture on the wall!
Fun fact: Anthony Richardson is the only Colts QB to start games in multiple seasons since 2018.
Unrelated, but not making Tommy Cutlets QB1 after the kind of performance he had against the Patriots last night is the most flagrant case of anti-Italian discrimination since Sacco & Vanzetti.
And putting pineapple on pizza.
Reminds me of a story by YTer Jag9 about how the Colts played so badly in the game against the Steelers in 1992 it caused a fan to tune out of the game and left the living room when the tornado hits.
When I read Jones was the starter I thought pretty much the same thing.. boy richardson must really suck
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I had basically the same read on the situation as you did; Jones is almost definitely going to be the better player than Richardson, be more effective at winning games, be more likely to not shoot any chance the Colts have at the playoffs in the foot, but I still thought Richardson would win the job anyways because I thought Steichen and Ballard need Anthony Richardson to not be a negative of a top 5 pick to keep their jobs.
I’m not sure the fire is under their seats, I think they may already be cooked if they’re going for a guy who will give you 4/10 QB play, because they know there’s no way Richardson is going to give you above 2/10.
WELLLLP!!!!!