RIP Airship Elite Moneys. We hardly knew yee. The Defenders have regained an advantage over the Offenders. The Offenders still control most of the elite money surplus. The world has gone that way. Once, things were different. Quarterbacks weren’t so important. But they changed the game. The Offenders were obsessed with progress. They were not content with 3 yards and a cloud of dust. Of barely scraping by with fewer than 20 points. They demanded evolution. Revolution. The passing attack was a crippling blow to the staunch traditionalists known as the Defenders. The Defenders long controlled the game. They kept the Offenders honest. They beat the clock. They beat the men. The Offenders could not tolerate this stifling of progress. That’s how we’ve come to this. This war may never end.

With the creation of the Lucky Airship Elite Moneys it seemed as if the Offenders had stayed one step ahead of the Defenders and their mighty leader Lord Watt. Things looked grim for a while when the Defenders developed the Money Jaegers. The Offenders could not keep the Defenders from destroying their forts. Their homes. Their accomplishments. The Offenders are a peaceful race. They do not wish to be touched. To be hit. To feel pain. The Defenders see them as weak. Little did we ever expect the Defenders to have a space program. General Von Miller, the flatulent one, secretly installed an entire fleet of laser satellites in orbit to one day combat this problem, should it arise.

Will our hero Offenders survive the crash of the Airship Elite Moneys? Will they ever manage to escape the oppressive regime of the Defenders? Will they take to the skies, or burn them down? I guess we just have to wait for the next stupid contract.

Congrats Von, you deserved it.