I’ve been a fool. All this time, I’ve been a fool. How could I possibly think anyone else was the GOAT. Did you see that game on Sunday? Did you see it? There is no question left in my mind. Trent Dilfer is the GOAT.

I don’t see how it’s even arguable. Tom Brady? Tom Brady has lost 2 Super Bowls, both to the very same team that Trent Dilfer defeated. He beat Michael Strahan in his PRIME. You know who else was a coach on that Giants squad? Sean Payton and John Fox. Trent Dilfer beat a team led by two Super Bowl coaches. He pissed on them. Trent Dilfer beat the Giants 34-7. Tom Brady and the mighty Patriots could only score 31 points against the Giants in TWO GAMES COMBINED. One with the “best offense ever”. Tom Brady sucks. Did you see him throw a pick 6 in the Super Bowl? Trent Dilfer hasn’t done that. Trent Dilfer hasn’t even thrown an interception in a Super Bowl. Pathetic. Yeah, Tom has won more, but what does it say that the Patriots had to squeak by and earn all of those wins when Trent Dilfer could throw for a measly 153 yards and still blow out the one team Tom Brady can’t beat. Sad!

You think Tom Brady’s big comeback in SB 51 makes him the GOAT? All I saw was a team that needed a huge comeback and a gigantic choke from the Falcons to win a game that they were losing so badly thanks to how poorly Tom Brady played for 2 and a half quarters. Trent Dilfer could play like shit for a whole game and blow out the other team. You think BRADY is the GOAT after this? Are you nuts?

Trent has a perfect Super Bowl record. But Dave, you claim, so does Joe Montana, and Brad Johnson, and Eli Manning, and a bunch of other scrubs. Screw those chumps. You know what Trent Dilfer did after he won the Super Bowl? He went to Disney World. HE WASN’T EVEN THE MVP, but Disney looked at Ray Lewis and still understood who the real star was. Know what else Trent Dilfer did after winning the Super Bowl? Stopped being a Raven. No other Super Bowl starter has not been on the team next year. That’s stone cold innovation, baby. Trent told that stupid failed steel mill burg full of complex drug rings that make good TV shows to HELL WITH THEM. Trent Dilfer struck his own path. Like a GOAT should.

Trent Dilfer looks like a thumb. You know, the most important digit on any hand. All these pretty boy QBs need to back off. Bring Thumbs back. GOAT thumb.

Is Trenton New Jersey named after Trent Dilfer? It is. They named it before he was born, anticipating his greatness. It’s a special kind of honor, because New Jersey is where the Giants play, and Trent Dilfer beat the Giants (unlike Tom Brady). It’s like Jersey already knew who their daddy was. That’s R.E.S.P.E.C.T. Not just a little bit, either.

Trent Dilfer helped invent QBR. Has Tom Brady invented a stat to measure his own greatness? No. Neither has Peyton. Marino? Ha, maybe if he stopped snorting coke once in a while. You think Rodgers is better than Dilfer? I bet Dilfer actually talks to his family, like a true American. When I saw someone say that TD got into the Hall of Fame, I was confused, because TRENT DILFER IS HIS OWN HALL OF FAME, HE DONT NEED NO CANTON BULLSHIT. GOATRENT.

So lets stop arguing about who the GOAT is. We’re just arguing for second place. Wayne Gretsky, Michael Jordan, Babe Ruth, Pele, and Trent Dilfer, and Dilfer’s head is the biggest. There’s your damn Mt. Rushmore of GOATs.

If any fool even tries to argue this point I will edit their comment to reflect the truth that Trent Dilfer is the Greatest of All Time. I will not stand for such slander.