Here you are, my fellow Giants, Vikings, Lions, Packers, Redskins, Falcons, Bucs, Panthers, Cardinals, 49ers, Raiders, Broncos, Titans, Jaguars, Steelers, Browns, Bengals, Jets, Dolphins, Bills fans. You sit on the precipice of another playoff season where your emotions are irrelevant outside hate and bitterness for those around you who are happy. You can’t just root against everyone you hate, you have to have a preference for someone in every game. That’s the law. What are you going to do instead? Not watch the Playoffs? hahahahahahahaha

This year should be an interesting field. We don’t have any clear favorites. Everyone has stumbled enough on this path to make this playoff season very intriguing. Even the Patriots look like a slightly less imposing version of their usual selves. Gronk is a shell of himself and Brady has had some questionable throws this year. They are still pretty much a lock for the AFCCG, but this is about as mortal as the Patriots have looked for a while now.

The Bears have a killer D but an inconsistent offense. Trubes sometimes looks like a stud and sometimes eats pubes. This team is a true wildcard, but if the offense is clicking they might be the most dangerous team in the NFC.

The Saints look all-around solid, but spent a lot of the year looking like a less interesting version of last year’s Saints. They are probably the easiest bet for NFCCG pick, but they just aren’t quite as sexy as they seem like they should be.

The Cowboys started slow and then seemed to find something, but still don’t feel that scary because the coaching staff is still run by Jason Garrett, who is trash garbage. If you hate the Cowboys, it might almost be beneficial to root for them in the wild card round, simply to ensure this buffoon keeps his job. The Boys are playing inspired ball, which is always dangerous. The Hot Team is always a big risk. But there are enough flaws here to think the Boys probably won’t make it to the NFCCG.

The Seahawks are another HOT TEAM who people might underestimate. Somehow a Brian Schottenheimer offense is…working. I know, it doesn’t make sense, but it is actually working. Maybe this is the Russell with protection we were denied under Tom Cable.

The Eagles squeaked in with some Big Dick Plays, but the magic has to run out at some point, right? Right? If Nick Foles leads this team on another deep playoff run there might be a legitimate QB controversy in Philly. Especially since Wentz plays football in a reckless fashion that usually results in injury, and has already done so.

The Rams are THE SYSTEM but got exposed down the stretch by good defenses. Sean McVay has not shown the ability to win ugly, and if they can’t control the game, the Rams are in trouble.

The Ravens are a true wild card as well. An amazing defense is always an asset in the playoffs, but the inexperience on offense might prove to be their undoing. If they keep Lamar working, this is a solid dark horse team. The Ravens under Harbaugh have always shown the ability to win ugly situations like this.

The Chiefs are so much fun to watch, but part of that is because they have to keep scoring because they are incapable of stopping pretty much anybody. Pat Mahomes has won a ton of hearts this season and rightfully so, it would be a shame to only get one more game with him doing Pat Mahomes things.

The Chargers are the best team no one gives two shits about. They have an empty stadium thanks to the owner flicking off the San Diego faithful and the fickle town of LA not giving a shit or already latching onto the Rams instead. And yet Rivers and co. are playing amazing ball right now. It would be a damn shame to see this team finally crest the mountain after they abandoned their fans to gain stock value in no man’s land, but this is still a very fun team and probably the most hip bandwagon choice.

The Texans are good! The defense found itself and the offense is finally fun.

The Colts are the Cinderella story this year, starting off very poorly and fighting back to surprise us all with a playoff berth. If they make it to the AFCCG, that stupid PARTICIPANT banner could be flown with genuine pride, because this team didn’t appear to be anywhere close to this.

I am personally on the Chargers/Chiefs/Rams/Bears bandwagon. If that ends up our championship game matchups, I’m happy. I’d be okay with the Saints/Ravens/Texans pulling it off. I’d tolerate but groan for the Colts or Seahawks. If the Eagles, Cowboys, or Patriots win it all, this season sucks forever and we should burn it from history.

Or just root for Chaos, the one true choice