3 Halloweens now have had something Joe Buck related, I guess that’s going to be my Halloween gag.

I kind of hate Joe Buck. I don’t hate him as much as I hate Cris Collinsworth, but that’s mostly because Joe Buck is a little easier to tune out due to his monotone. Collinsworth has unbearable amounts of smug. Buck’s biggest problem is his obvious biases towards various teams, and his ability to call an exciting play as if it’s a wet puddle. Everyone knows his terrible call of the Helmet Catch. “Eli back to pass, under pressure, stays on his feet, throws downfield to Tyree who makes the catch”. One of the biggest plays in football history, in the biggest game of the year which is all about spectacle, and he made it sound like a 3 yard run in a preseason game.

To be honest, though, that’s not my Joe Buck totally blows moment. For me, the worst Joe Buck game I’ve ever heard was the Giants/Saints game from two years back, the game when David Wilson went nuts and scored 3 Touchdowns in what turned out to be his career highlight game. Why? Because in that game Joe Buck tried to inject a little excitement into his playcalls, and he was so bad. This is the only video I can find of it, but it’s the second highlight, the Kick Return touchdown.  Joe Buck’s call of that play has stuck with me since he first made it. He has several moments of total silence during the runback, and the “Thank you very much!” at the end is just SO. BAD. It’s “Boom goes the Dynamite” levels of bad, but Joe Buck is an experienced professional sportscaster, and Boom goes the Dynamite guy was a young kid who wasn’t ready for primetime yet and was clearly uncomfortable and trying to make something work. There is no excuse for a call that bad. It still astounds me, because it made me think that Buck might actually be better when he doesn’t try and be exciting. Buck is better when he sucks the life out of plays, because trying to inject life into plays turns him into a robot trying to find out what it means to love. And failing.