The Cutler Era is finally over in Chicago. 8 years. 8 years! It feels like just yesterday Josh McDaniels was taking a huge dump all over the Broncos and Cutler came into Chicago a hero. A semi-local hero who grew up a Bears fan, an actual starting caliber QB with all kinds of potential, just a few years off a Super Bowl run. The Bears were looking up! Who cared if he had a dumb punchy dough face? Bear Down Baby!

Then he hurt his knee in the NFCCG and had the audacity to smile on the sidelines for some unknown reason and all of Chicago turned on him because as we’ve seen with Cam Newton, these players get to play a game but god forbid they ever seem happy about it. One must SUFFER and take lumps like MEN and any display of EMOTION other than GRIT DETERMINATION is BAD. If you display CONFIDENCE or SHOW OFF IN ANY WAY you are SCUM who deserves NOTHING BUT SCORN FOREVER. The media’s immediate treatment of Cutler for that game turned me into a Cutler fan instantly. His “Fuck off” attitude persona that became a meme later was the other reason. I love characters. Cutler is a billion times more interesting than Joe Lineman who has all the grit and determination ever, which makes him more entertaining, which in turn makes my watching of him more fun.

Cutler was the best QB Chicago has ever had, even though he was basically average. He was hamstrung by bad coaching, frequent coaching changes, an angry fanbase, and probably the measles since his kids aren’t vaccinated since he married a California reality show bimbo who doesn’t understand how science works. It looks like he’s going to the Jets as of my writing this so that’ll be hilarious. Chicago replaced him with Mike “The Neck” Glennon. A man who looks like a giraffe, a grey alien, and napoleon dynamite got freaky.  He’s not very good. The Bears offense is going to be hot garbage next year and I’m going to enjoy the realization slowly happening among bitter Bears fans that Cutler really wasn’t really the problem.

I don’t know if Don’t Care Jet has the same ring to it, so who knows how this is gonna go. I’ll miss Don’t Care Bear.